Divorce is hard on everyone—those who have called it quits and those who date them in the future. Everyone suffers, but none more than that overanalyzing, perfectionistic Virgo man. This is the kind of man who fights for his relationships, and it can take a toll when they don’t work out. Read on for the essential facts you need to know about dating (and becoming serious about) a divorced Virgo Man.
All of us are healing from the past in one way or another. Whether you were divorced five years or five months ago, it takes time, and sometimes certain things never really heal over.
However, as human beings, we always want to open ourselves up for new love, right? Love, after all, makes the world go around!
A typical Virgo man really does want a long-term relationship. Being an earth sign, this guy is eager for stability and commitment, and he aches to share his life with a special woman.
A truly self-effacing sign, Virgo men may be extremely hard on themselves after a divorce. The very best thing you can do for them is offer a bit of empathy and loads of compassion. This will go a long way to helping him build trust in a new relationship.
Here are a few more things to know if you are dating a divorced Virgo man:
7 Things to Know When Dating a Divorced Virgo Man
1. He Never Settles for Less Than He Needs
Here’s the thing: Virgo men have extremely high standards. They have a clear idea of what perfection looks like, and they don’t like making the same mistake twice. This can be a bit of a problem in the beginning stages of your relationship, but it can also be a great thing. A Virgo man knows what he’s looking for.
This may lead to him criticizing you or expecting what seems like perfection from you. Virgo men are hyper and fussy, after all, but their other, lovely qualities more than make up for that! Do be prepared for this, though.
It’s not that you aren’t good enough. Say this to yourself every time he makes one of his infamous insensitive comments.
The best possible outcome of this is that he directs most of the criticism toward his ex—listen carefully and take notes!
2. He’s Looking For Stability
Virgo men are earth signs, and all earth signs want is stability and certainty when it comes to relationships.
Some Virgo men may attempt to play the field right after a divorce, but that’s not who they really are. It runs contrary to their nature to have a casual relationship, and they tend to get far too attached, anyway!
This doesn’t mean that you need to push commitment onto him—he may still be going through the stages of grief. But rest assured that he will come around, and make your relationship something to be taken seriously.
Even though he may still have fears around marriage, he will usually gravitate toward a stable relationship. It makes him feel safe and secure.
3. He Blames Himself
Something you may pick up about the Virgo man is that he’s always looking for flaws—in himself and in others. He wants to be perfect and places unrealistic expectations on himself. When his marriage comes to an end, this is one guy that will usually take on all the blame.
This can be frustrating to watch. You see the good in him, but he often fails to see it in himself. He may beat himself up for not being a good enough provider, not being present enough, or working too hard. He may project this criticism onto his ex, too, but most of the time he will put himself down.
What can you do about it? Be his anchor. Remind him of the facts, not his feelings. Encourage him to be kinder to himself, and remind him that no one is perfect. Show him all the compassion you can possibly muster, and this will help speed his healing.
4. He’ll Overanalyze Your Relationship
Because the Virgo man is scared of making mistakes (again), he will totally overanalyze your relationship. He’ll look for all the little flaws and problems that he needs to solve, which can make your relationship a bit of a tough place to be in sometimes!
Try to gently turn his attention to other problems that need “solving.” Things around the house, your problems, problems at work. The Virgo man needs to keep his mind very occupied so that he doesn’t try and pick apart your relationship. Having other channels will help keep his self-doubt at bay.
Try to also practice empathy. The Virgo guy can be a little neurotic, and he worries far too much about all the things he can never, ever fix. He just needs a little bit of extra love and patience!
5. His Family Comes First
Virgo men take their duties very seriously indeed. This also extends to any responsibility they have towards their first family. His kids, particularly, will always be incredibly important to him, and he’ll make any number of sacrifices to make sure they’re provided for.
This is definitely something to admire about the Virgo man. It can, of course, be frustrating to feel like you’re in “second place” when it comes to your relationship. Try and carve out special one-on-one time just for the two of you.
The Virgo man may also still have duties involving his ex-wife, and he wants to do the right thing. Let him do it—but check him when he’s going too far. He needs your eyes and ears!
6. He May Still Provide For His Ex
This goes hand-in-hand with the above. Virgo men feel useful when they can provide a service of some kind. Of course, this could mean misplaced service, so you may have to, over time, remind him that he doesn’t owe his ex anything.
Now, don’t mistake his sense of duty for residual feelings. He may feel the need to help even after he has unequivocally moved on.
Whether that’s paying her gas bill or rescuing her out of a messy situation, giving her financial advice or handing over far too much of his salary—there are many ways a Virgo man feels responsible for his ex!
If this is infringing on your relationship, it’s important to lay down some boundaries. If not, then let him be and allow him to indulge his caring nature—but keep a close watch on things. Remind him to also take care of himself, too.
7. He’s Ready For Love
Virgo men love to love. They love being in love. They love sharing their ideas with someone else. They love growing and learning. They also love their alone time, but they do want someone to spend their lives with.
Once they get over the past and see what’s in front of them, these men can be very special, kind-hearted partners.
You just need to give them that chance and trust that things will work out.
Are you dating a divorced guy? What challenges have you come up against? I’d love to hear your questions or your story in the comments—it’s anonymous!
Your friend and relationship astrologer,