Hello, my beauties! Dating a Virgo man is difficult as they don’t have the most simple or relaxed personalities… They can be pretty high-strung and nervous, and then they put so much pressure on themselves to be perfect. It is tough!
This is why dating a Virgo man is difficult, he has a lot on his shoulders and when it comes to love he often feels confused by it and like he might not be good enough to be in a relationship with someone.
A Virgo man can be heard to read and it isn’t always that easy figuring out what he is thinking or how he is feeling. This is why I so often get my clients send me frustrated emails saying “A Virgo man is confusing me!!!”
Yes, Virgo men are complicated, but they don’t have to be if you take the time to understand them and what they are about as men. Are you confused by a Virgo guy and find him incredibly complicated? Then you have come to the right place.
Keep on reading to find out more about why Virgo men are so hard to read.
Why Are Virgos So Complicated?
Dating a Virgo man is difficult, and the reason for this is likely to have to do with his ruling planet Mercury. This is the sign of communication and intelligence. This is a very busy planet, which just illustrates that there is a lot going on in the mind of a Virgo man.
These men tend to be quite anxious and nervous; they are always overthinking and analysing every little move they make. This can make it very difficult for them to be in a relationship; being with someone tends to give them anxiety.
And to boot, a Virgo man has a tendency to always want to strive towards perfection. They put this intense pressure on themselves to be absolutely perfect, and this isn’t ever possible.
So when it comes to a relationship, Virgo men keep searching for the perfect partner, not realizing this person probably doesn’t exist. Learn here what a Virgo man likes in a woman.
7 Reasons To Explain Why Dating A Virgo Man Is Difficult
He Is Highly Strung
So, if you’ve been wondering, are Virgo men difficult? The answer is that the Virgo man is actually quite simple when you think about it. While he can be critical of himself and of his partner, his intent is only to improve what he perceives as a weakness.
To a sensitive person, this can be perceived as cold, calculated, or flat out. But he doesn’t mean to be this way. He’s just trying to be honest with you, and it’s up to you whether or not you can handle his version of the truth.
Aside from this, he wants a very simple and stable life. A Virgo man wants a partner who understands him, has similar qualities, can help him be a bit more outgoing, someone who will be truthful with him, and will basically be his soul mate.
He wants a relationship that will last a lifetime. Once a Virgo man truly loves someone, he loves them with all he’s got, which makes him vulnerable to possible heartbreak. He goes out of his way more than other signs to avoid that pain.
This also makes him seem cold or “unreachable”. A Virgo man will play the hot and cold game until he feels comfortable. Hot, as in, he tells you he likes you and wants to spend time with you.
Next thing you know, he’s off doing his own thing, and you don’t hear from him for a while, or maybe he doesn’t respond to your text message.
He’s reaffirming that he is self-sufficient, and he’s being careful with his heart to make sure you don’t break it. Once you understand this, you’ll be able to truly know why he does what he does.
He Wants Perfection
Many women claim or ask themselves: Are Virgo men difficult? Because he is a difficult one to snag up. The truth is, they’re really particular about what they are looking for. If he’s being “off” or somewhat “cold” to you, he may just not be that into you.
He isn’t super affectionate when he’s getting to know someone. There is a rare occasion, though, when he’ll immediately open up and go with the flow. If he does, it’s because he’s very intuitive and simply knows this person is the one.
He’s always looking for his soul mate. If he feels in some way that the person he is dating or seeing isn’t living up to that, he’ll pull back. He can, on occasion, pull back from fear as well.
If he gets too close to someone and it becomes scary, he’ll be terrified and it could fail. However, the Virgo man pulling back is typically very temporary, and he’ll come back ready to fully commit.
He’s slow to make a choice because he always wants to make sure he’s doing the right thing, choosing the right person, and doing what feels good.
You may also want to read: Is Your Virgo Man Losing Interest? (7 Signs To Look Out For)
He Is Serious About Love
Some call the Virgo man the prude of the Zodiac. That is actually not true at all. He just isn’t one to want to dive into bed without getting to know someone or establishing a relationship.
A Virgo man isn’t the type to do one night stands or “friends with benefits”. If he does agree to something like that, it likely will not last, as she will not be the one he wants to live out his life with. He’ll see her as a temporary solution.
This sensual man is very finicky, but it’s for a purpose. It’s not because he wants to be perceived as a cold-hearted jerk. He’s actually very warm, tender, funny, sensual, passionate, and loyal when he’s in love.
If he’s not heading in that direction with you, he may just not be that interested or doesn’t see himself having a future with you. It’s not because he’s horrible or that you are. It just means he’s being honest with what he feels.
Honesty does not mean being cold and calculated. It means that sometimes the truth isn’t what someone wants to hear. Sadly, he has a very bad reputation for being honest. And it might be why women ask me: Are Virgo men difficult?
He Is Cutthroat
If he does get this way with you, it’s because he cares, and it has nothing to do with this question: Is dating a Virgo man difficult? It may not seem like it, and to some, it seems like he’s picking on them. He always sees ways to improve life, improve oneself, and help others improve themselves.
Caring about you includes giving you advice on how you can improve something. It’s not because he doesn’t like you or thinks you’re problematic. He’s simply trying to improve your life.
Honestly, if a Virgo man doesn’t like you or doesn’t want to be with you, he’ll make it very evident and is likely to actually tell you that it’s not working and walk away. He doesn’t like wasting his time and energy.
When he takes time out for himself, he isn’t doing it because he isn’t into you. It’s because he’s either too close to you or just needs to breathe for a minute. Don’t panic! Let him have his time and space; he’ll reward you for it.
He Struggles With Vulnerability
The Virgo man will often put up quite a strong front of being well put together, but the truth is, underneath his mask, he is actually very insecure and sensitive. He puts up walls for a reason, and that is because he doesn’t want to get hurt.
One of the biggest reasons why a Virgo man is so difficult to be with is because he finds it difficult to relax and trust people. He knows what it is like to get hurt, and this is a feeling he tries to stay away from as often as possible.
Sometimes a Virgo man can confuse softness with weakness. He thinks that if he takes down his masks, he will be seen as weak and not manly enough. So he wears a mask to appear strong and confident.
This means that it can be difficult for him to open up his heart to love, because to truly love someone, you need to be vulnerable and willing to show your softer side. Openness is required, and this isn’t always easy for the Virgo man.
He Feels The Pressure
The pressure a Virgo man seems to feel is immense. He puts so much pressure on himself to be perfect that it can often be rather difficult for him to cope. When events happen in his life, he tends to become hyperfocused on one thing.
Stress is not something he deals with easily. It tends to really get to him, especially when it comes to his work. He is used to being high achieving and he wants his co-workers to know that they can depend on him.
However, you may have noticed that when things go well in his professional life, he tends to also bring this energy into the relationship. He can’t accept that one area of his life might be thriving while the other is going up in flames.
When one little thing goes wrong in the Virgo man’s life, he tends to let it seep into other aspects of his life. He feels pressure intensely, and it can get to him a lot more than to most people. This is why it is difficult to date him because you may feel like his punching bag.
He Doesn’t Believe He Is Good Enough
Virgo men have a lot of amazing traits and qualities they bring to their relationships and life in general. However, there is one very sad thing all Virgo men seem to struggle with, and that is believing that they aren’t good enough.
As I mentioned previously, a Virgo man will put a lot of pressure on himself to be perfect. But no matter how hard he strives to be perfect, it isn’t always easy for him to trust that he is enough or worthy of goodness in his life.
He will often self-sabotage and block the blessings in his life simply because he doesn’t feel like he has earned them. Because of this mindset, he may find it difficult to believe that he is worthy of love and being in a healthy relationship.
So when you fall for a Virgo man, you may be met with a lot of resistance, and he may claim that he can’t be with you because he isn’t worthy of your love. It can take a lot of your time and patience to try to convince him that he is good enough.
Here’s more on how to get a Virgo man to open up and share his feelings.
I Like A Virgo Man Who Is Incredibly Hard To Read, What Should I Do?
Most Virgo men are quite hard to read; they don’t always reveal what is going on in their minds, and trust me, it is a lot. They are like busy bees, trying to analyse and overthink every little situation they find themselves in.
However, when a Virgo man likes a woman, he will definitely try his best to get closer to her. If a Virgo man is spending time with you and making an effort with you, then chances are he likes you. His signals might just be a lot more subtle than other men’s.
Trust the feeling you have when you are with him, and don’t put so much pressure on making the relationship official or anything. Just be yourself, but also be patient and realize that a Virgo man is going to take his time when making a commitment. Just ease into it.
FAQs On Why Are Virgos So Hard To Love
Are Virgo Men Sensitive?
Virgo men are quite sensitive, and probably more sensitive than you realize. Usually, these guys are wearing somewhat of a mask, trying to hide how they really feel because they are afraid of seeming weak.
They can be a little insecure, so they try to shut people out so they don’t appear “weak.” It is always best to work gently with a Virgo man, as they are already so critical of themselves that they don’t need you to add to it either.
Why Are Virgos So Hard To Date?
Virgo men can be so hard to date. They put so much pressure on themselves as well as on the people in their lives. The reason they are so hard to date is that they are actually deathly afraid of love and relationships. They are scared of being vulnerable, so they put up a wall and don’t let anyone in.
End Anxiety About Your Virgo Man…
It can be SO painful to worry about how to make things work with a Virgo man who won’t commit.
I know. I’ve been there with many of my friends dating Virgo guys.
I remember my very close friend crying herself to sleep at night, worried that her man would never commit to her. She lost sleep, time, and even work hours, all because she couldn’t figure out how to capture his heart and get him to commit.
As a friend, it was hard to watch her go through that.
But I knew how good he was for her, and I didn’t want her to give up on him. Even when our other friends were telling her to move on, I could see that he was the most incredible man she had ever met.
How could she just give up on that?
But it wasn’t easy.
It took a LOT of work.
She had to learn how to speak a different language… Virgo man’s love language.
And it worked!!!
So if you are ready to sleep like a baby… Knowing your Virgo man is MADLY in love with you… And never feel anxious about him again…
Go here now to see how to speak your Virgo man’s love language.
xoxo, Anna
Hi anna,
I truly appreciate your blog. and I want to know more about a virgo man. because I myself is dating one. Here’s the thing, I’ve been going out lately with a virgo guy. He’s actually 10 years older than me. We always invites me to eat on our favorite fast food chain and we end our date having coffee while waiting for the sunrise together on our favorite coffee shop. Everytime that I am with this virgo guy he opens up about him getting married and how scared he is to become a father one day. he said that he is afraid that he might not be able to carry out the responsibility. We haven’t talked for a week like we used to but oncein awhile he sends me message and asks if I missed him. Last night, He invited me again in the middle of the wee hours to eat out but I suddenly said that I can’t because I ran out of money. then he just replied that he’ll just get the food delivery. I kinda felt sad because I wanted to see him. I actually said I was really hungry but I’ll just sleep and eat when I wake up but after a few minutes he texted me that we just go out so that I can eat. and then I asked him what about the food delivery, He said that he doesn’t mind he’ll just give it to his dog. I was really touched about what he did. But he hasn’t opened up to me or cleared out any of his intentions. what do you think? does he like me or he just being friendly?
truly appreciate your blog. and I want to know more about a virgo man. because I myself is dating one. Here’s the thing, I’ve been going out lately with a virgo guy. He’s actually 10 years older than me. We always invites me to eat on our favorite fast food chain and we end our date having coffee while waiting for the sunrise together on our favorite coffee shop. Everytime that I am with this virgo guy he opens up about him getting married and how scared he is to become a father one day. he said that he is afraid that he might not be able to carry out the responsibility. We haven’t talked for a week like we used to but oncein awhile he sends me message and asks if I missed him. Last night, He invited me again in the middle of the wee hours to eat out but I suddenly said that I can’t because I ran out of money. then he just replied that he’ll just get the food delivery. I kinda felt sad because I wanted to see him. I actually said I was really hungry but I’ll just sleep and eat when I wake up but after a few minutes he texted me that we just go out so that I can eat. and then I asked him what about the food delivery, He said that he doesn’t mind he’ll just give it to his dog. I was really touched about what he did. But he hasn’t opened up to me or cleared out any of his intentions. what do you think? does he like me or he just being friendly?
Hi Danielle! What many women do not know about the Virgo man is how generous he actually can be. He would help just about anyone that needs it and not ask any questions about it. He’s always there for his friends and family when they need his help. What he did for you doesn’t surprise me. It sounds like he’s actually already opened up to you to some degree talking about marriage and fear about possibly becoming a father. That’s very personal and private. Virgo men don’t tell anyone their personal business unless they see something there and feel they can trust their partner. Give him time and be patient. He will continue to open up to you as time goes on and certainly if he makes a bigger commitment to you.
I have a Virgo man friend and I was worried about him a few weeks ago and I sent him a few texts just to let him know I was there if he needed any help and he had a go at me for texting him even though I hadn’t for at least 4 weeks! So I decided to give him some space which I think he will appreciate and to my amazement he text me twice and we had a texting session. But he does confuse me as he won’t always open up to me. We’ve known each other for quite a while, but only got back in touch 3 years ago, it’s strange because I feel like I know him but I also feel like I don’t know him! Once I can coax him to chat and open up he doesn’t stop talking. He is a mystery!
Hi Sue!
Yes, sometimes giving space makes him feel more comfortable and at ease. If you two are only friends then he doesn’t feel he needs to fully open up with you. If there is something that you want with him on a more romantic tone, you’ll have to tell him that otherwise he’ll be oblivious and stay friends. Keep initiating and keep coaxing and you’ll break down his walls. You may want to read my book “Virgo Man Secrets” to reveal even more information.
Hi,
I hope you see this and respond, I need help! I have a Virgo male friend I can’t understand. He tells me he only wants to be friends but he make sure he doesn’t lose contact with me. During the call we may get into a debate and he then says this is why we can’t go further in a relationship. If he feels this way. Why does he keep calling? It’s not that I want him to stop calling but it’s torture that he keep calling because I am in love with him and want a future with him.
Hi Nicole!
It seems that he’s not ready for a relationship so he opts to have this friendship with you for now. With time and patience, he’ll get to know you better. He wants to see what this could be like without being actually in it. He keeps calling because he likes you otherwise he wouldn’t. If you love him then you’ll be patient and see where it leads. He needs to have reassurance it will work before he dives in. Being friends an opening up to each other is a definite way to build that trust and care. If you would like more tips, check out my Virgo man books sweetheart.
Hello Anna,
I have known a virgo guy for 4 months , two of them are dating and two of them were via texting since I was away. After first month of talking he lost his father and we continued talking eventhough he became quite distant and we started dating face to face two months ago when I came back .
He always expresses how much he likes me and when I am with him I feel so much love and he will be like Romeo. However he doesn’t plan to see me much and its been bothering me and I have picked up some fights with him about his lack of effort. He always says he is busy focused on his work and he is probably dealing with alot of emotions now and trying to stand still on his foot again. I sometimes come off as dramatic and needy but its only because i feel the lack of his effort to make time for me, even though we texts so often. If he feels that I am pushing him he becomes cold and behaves rudely.
He told me he needs time so that he can be where I want him to be ( emotionally and commitment wise )
Like he would say things like you are made for me and the next day he would cancel to meet me. I am very confused. I am struggling since I get anxious and I am trying not to be needy so that he doesn’t close off. Please give me an advice.
Hi Maryanne!
The way he reacts to what he perceives as negativity or pushing with coldness. That’s a Virgo for sure. If he’s telling you he’s working on himself so that he can give you all you deserve then that’s what he’s doing. He’s not in a place yet where he can give you his all so either you need to move on OR you can have patience to wait him out. Give him time to see if he really does get himself together. That’s about the only way you two have a chance. I think if he’s telling you the truth about how much he cares then you shouldn’t shoot that down sweetheart. Virgo men are complicated and he sounds very typical of the sign. If you need more help, check out my guides on Virgo Man Secrets. I wish you the best!
Hello Anna
Thank you so much for your reply. He recently asked for space and I agreed with him, even though i am very sad inside ( i tried so hard to keep my emotions in check ) . I asked him if its space or he want to end things, so he said he just needs space and he said also i hope you dont disappear, and its no ones fault its just now is not a good time for him. And I also asked him if he wants us to be together in the near future. He said yeah and that we fit so well together.
So taking on from this its been 5 days. He checked on me once via instagram since he know i was traveling. I replied in a short way in respect to his need of space and to not make a convo.
I am not talking to him or anything and waiting for him to reach out. How long should I wait and do you suggest that i only talk if he reaches ?
Also, should I apologize to him for being negative and impatient and that added pressure on him without him realizing ?
I am not sure if he is also taking me for granted.
Is there anyway we can talk on emails ?
Thanks alott !!!