Hello, my loves, it is Anna here. I know how tough it is to be with a Virgo man, and then suddenly feel him pulling away… It can be so confusing and heartbreaking. But, when a Virgo man pulls away, it is not so uncommon though.
These guys are usually quite neurotic and anxious, so they tend to retreat when they feel overwhelmed or when they sense something is not quite right in the relationship.
The good news is that there are things you can do to get your Virgo man back! I have come up with some time-tested Astrological tips that can help you get to the root of the issue and hopefully get your man back where he belongs – by your side.
Please don’t assume that your Virgo man has lost interest in you because there may be other reasons going on. Keep reading to find out what to do when your Virgo man is pulling away!
Why Is A Virgo Man Pulling Away? What Scares Him Away?
I have to say, Virgo men are definitely an interesting breed. They are incredibly intelligent, hardworking, and have extremely high standards. And these high standards often lead to them to scrutinize every little detail in a relationship, which can cause them to become overwhelmed and pull away.
He is a perfectionist through and through, so anything he perceives as “wrong” with the relationship, no matter how small, will trigger him to retreat. His high standards will also often make him feel like he needs order, stability and control in the relationship – and if he feels like he is losing that, he will pull away.
A lack of control is one of his biggest fears and is the thing that might make him retreat the most. Another reason he might pull away is because he is logical and analytical, so when emotions run high, he will want to distance himself to process his feelings.
Virgo men also tend to be very busy with work and always have a million things on their plate, so if he feels like the relationship is becoming too much to handle on top of everything else, he’ll pull back.
When a Virgo man is stressed, overloaded or feels like he’s losing control, his natural instinct is to retreat and withdraw.
4 More Reasons Why Does A Virgo Man Pull Away…
Sometimes in a relationship, a Virgo man might pull away for other reasons too, like:
Feeling The Pressure
Virgo men generally don’t like a lot of pressure or expectations placed on them. If he feels like the relationship is moving too fast or that there is too much pressure on him, he might pull away.
The reason he does this is that he likes to feel in control and he doesn’t want to make a commitment before he is 100% sure. Feeling pressure is definitely not a good feeling for a Virgo man.
This can become too much for him and cause him to become distant. When this happens it can give you a nudge to be a little more relaxed and let him lead the pace of the relationship.
Needing More Alone Time
Virgo men are quite introverted and really value their alone time. They need a lot of time to recharge, process their thoughts and feelings, and just do their own thing.
If you’ve been spending a lot of intense one-on-one time together, he might start to pull away because he desperately needs some time to himself. During this time, the best thing to do is give him the space he needs without being clingy or needy.
It is totally normal to want alone time, so don’t take it personally. This should be a sign that you need to focus a bit more on your own hobbies and interest to help take the pressure off of him.
He might feel too bad to say something to you so giving him the space he needs really is the best thing you can do.
Read also: Giving A Virgo Man Space To Figure Things Out (How Long To Wait For Him?)
Feeling Insecure
Your Virgo man is a sensitive soul, and sometimes this becomes a bit much for him. So much so that he might start taking the smallest thing personally or feeling insecure about things in the relationship.
He might think you’re losing interest or getting bored with him or that the relationship is lacking in some way. And because he is picking up a vibe, he might feel like if he is the one to pull away first, he can avoid the pain of you potentially leaving him.
When he feels insecure like this, his natural tendency is to retreat and put up those protective walls. Be patient with him during this time, reassure him, and make it clear that you still have strong feelings for him.
Unfortunately, if you try to force the issue or demand answers from him during this time, it will only push him further away. You will need to reassure him throughout the relationship to make him feel safe.
Lost In His Own World
Virgo men can sometimes get so lost in their own thoughts, their own little world, their own to-do lists that they completely forget about the outside world, including their partner.
He can be pretty singularly focused on whatever he has going on, whether it is work, a hobby, or something else. When he’s in this zone, he may become distant and disengaged from the relationship, even if he doesn’t mean to be.
The best thing you can do is be patient and understanding. Try not to take it personally when he gets like this because his moods will be up and down at times. He is a neurotic guy and he needs to be with a woman who understands this about him.
What To Do When A Virgo Man Pulls Away
Okay, so now that you understand some of the potential reasons why your Virgo man might be pulling away, what should you do about it? The most important thing is to be patient, understanding and not take it personally.
1. You Don’t Want To Do This…
First and foremost, don’t chase him or harass him. It’s a natural reaction to become scared when it seems like you might lose something important to you. Believe me, I understand! Feeling your lover slip through your fingertips is more painful than I can put into words.
Despite this, it’s important to stay calm. Virgos often take some time alone. They feel like there are inherent flaws within themselves that only they can understand. To process this, they will go off on their own from time to time.
More than likely, the issue is not with you. The Virgo will isolate themselves when they feel the weight of all of their mistakes too heavily. They sometimes need to take a while to work out their priorities once more.
It’s easy to blame yourself for your partner’s distance, but before you get up in arms, consider that they might just need a period without you to further process emotional wounds. It’s not easy to give your partner that space, but it is the ultimate act of trust to do so.
2. There is Hope…
Virgos are ruled by Mercury, the planet of mental processes and communication. Virgos are traditionally objective and difficult to get riled up. They don’t quite ‘get’ super emotional people all the time. They can understand having concerns, but those emotional explosions are something that just doesn’t compute for them.
If you realize that your Virgo guy is pulling away, it’s not the time to go into full panic mode. The Virgo will feel extra alienated by your strong reaction and likely put even more space between the two of you.
Curb the desire to scream or pull your hair out, though it can be tempting. Instead, take a page out of the Virgo’s own book: step away, take a breath, think it over, and return with a clear head. This is going to make the Virgo feel a whole lot better about returning to you.
You should also think about the ways that you can take some of the fire and passion out of your speech while talking about heated subjects. Virgo will clam up if they feel attacked, so keeping an even tone is your best bet.
3. The Quickest Way to Push Your Virgo Away…
The obvious reaction to seeing something you love leave you is to try to get it back. This makes sense for the most part. Sometimes people go too far and become extremely attached as a measure to ensure that their partner stays close to them.
While it feels like the logical move, the Virgo is bound to get even squirmier when he’s subjected to this. Virgo needs time alone, despite being a communicative sign. He is represented by the Hermit in Tarot, after all.
The Virgo isn’t likely to enjoy attempts to attach yourself to his hip. Instead, try telling him that you have a lot of things you’d like to talk about with him when he’s ready. Another technique is just giving him the space with no premise and allowing him to come back on his own.
4. A Big NO-NO
Something that isn’t talked about a lot with Virgos is how easily embarrassed they can get. They care a lot about their reputation. Just like their houses, they’d prefer their character to remain blemish-free.
They also think that their business should stay their business. When they’re the subject of gossip they are likely to shut down all further communication with the one dragging their name through the mud… so don’t let that person be you.
Keep business between the two of you and don’t fight dirty. Virgo doesn’t have a lot of respect for those who use disparaging language against them. Instead, bring your issues up with the Virgo directly. This is how conflicts get resolved.
5. The WORST Thing To Do
If you’re considering playing hard to get in order to get the Virgo to pay attention to you, then you may be out of luck. Virgos do indeed need their space at times, but they’re totally on board with communication when it serves a purpose.
When the Virgo gives signs that he wants to talk, don’t attempt to beat him at his own game. It’s tempting to think: “well, he hurt me with his silence so I should hurt him with mine.” It won’t work because it’s very likely that the Virgo had no intent to hurt you with his distance in the first place.
When the Virgo partner pulls a petty move by attempting to one up the Virgo, the Virgo doesn’t want to participate. Instead of doubling down his efforts to talk to you, he might just walk out the door for good.
Virgo doesn’t play head games well. They find them to be impractical and unnecessary. So, think twice before giving the Virgo a dose of their own medicine, consider being open to any communication that the Virgo offers you.
When A Virgo Man Pulls Away, Don’t Make These 5 Mistakes
Ultimately, the best approach is patience, understanding, and clear communication when dealing with a Virgo man who is pulling away. Here are some mistakes you shouldn’t make:
1. Chasing Him
When you chase a Virgo man who is pulling away, you’re more likely to push him further away. Virgos need their alone time to process their emotions and figure things out, so give him the space he needs.
2. Accusing Him
Virgos hate feeling accused or criticized. If you start accusing him of being distant or not caring, he’ll likely shut down even more. Instead, try to have an open and non-confrontational conversation about how you’ve been feeling.
3. Getting Emotional
Virgos can’t quite understand overly emotional responses. Try to keep your cool and avoid emotional outbursts, as this will only serve to confuse and alienate him further.
4. Playing Games
Virgos don’t respond well to games or manipulation. Don’t try to make him jealous or “punish” him by ignoring him. This will likely just annoy him and push him away more.
5. Giving Up
Patience is key when dealing with a pulled-away Virgo. Don’t give up on him, but also don’t suffocate him. Give him the space he needs, while making it clear you’re there when he’s ready to talk.
When A Virgo Man Stops Talking, Does That Mean He Is Losing Interest?
If your Virgo man has suddenly stopped talking to you as much, it could mean a few things. He may be dealing with other issues in his life that have nothing to do with you, or he may be unsure about the relationship and needs time to think.
This does not necessarily mean he is losing interest. Virgos can sometimes withdraw when they are feeling overwhelmed or uncertain. The key is not to panic or take it personally.
Instead, give him the space he needs while also making it clear you are there for him when he is ready to open up again. Don’t chase him or demand he explain himself, as this will likely only push him further away.
Be patient, and trust that if he has strong feelings for you, he will come back around once he has had time to process his thoughts and feelings.
Related: Is Your Virgo Man Losing Interest? (7 Signs To Look Out For)
Distancing Yourself From A Virgo Man: When To Walk Away From A Virgo Man?
If after giving him space and time, the Virgo man still does not come back or make efforts to reconnect, it may be time to start distancing yourself from the relationship.
A few signs it may be time to walk away are that he constantly shuts down communication, becomes dismissive or even cruel, and makes no effort to resolve issues or reconnect.
If he seems unwilling to put in the work to maintain the relationship, and you’ve exhausted all options for open and honest communication, it’s likely in your best interest to start emotionally detaching for your own wellbeing.
The Virgo man needs to feel he is with someone who respects his need for independence and works with him, not against him. If you can no longer provide that, it may be time to move on to someone more compatible.
FAQs On Virgo Man Pulling Away…
You may have some lingering questions, so here’s a quick FAQ:
Will A Virgo Man Come Back After No Contact?
If you give a Virgo man space during a pull-back and don’t chase him, there’s a good chance he will come back on his own. Virgos value independence and need that space, but they also deeply appreciate loyalty and patience in a partner.
How To Get A Virgo Man To Chase You Again?
The best way to get a Virgo man chasing you again is to not chase him. Focus on your own life and growth, and let him come to you. Virgos are drawn to confidence and independence, so work on that rather than trying to make him jealous or manipulate him.
You may also want to read:
Is Your Virgo Man Playing Mind Games? Here’s How To Tell
11 Warning Signs A Virgo Man Is Playing You
Are Virgo Men Toxic In A Relationships? Find Out Here
What Is The Best Thing To Do When A Virgo Man Is Distant Or Ignores You?
What To Do When A Virgo Man Sends Mixed Signals
Does Your Virgo Man Disappear After Intimacy?
Does your Virgo man pull away or get quiet when you’ve just had a deep emotional connection?
Or does he seem to disappear just when you thought he was getting closer?
Have you felt confused by his hot and cold behavior?
If so, then he might have an avoidant attachment style.
He could be Dismissive Avoidant and completely terrified of commitment…
Or he could be Fearful Avoidant and REALLY want commitment…
But get scared when he feels himself getting closer to you.
If he has either one of these attachment styles, you’re going to end up feeling extremely confused at times.
And both are caused by childhood trauma.
When you can see the scared little boy inside him that had to shut down his feelings if he’s dismissive avoidant…
Or have a parent not provide his needs consistently if he’s fearful avoidant…
It can make it easier to have empathy and compassion for his confusing and frustrating behavior.
But that won’t fix it.
And while advice on attachment styles can be helpful…
What you really need to stop this frustrating hot and cold cycle is to understand him better.
Thankfully…
There is a simple system to TRULY understand how he ticks based on his astrology.
It will stop your Virgo man from pulling back when you begin feeling closer.
And it will accomplish in only 30 days.
So no more crying yourself to sleep when your Virgo pulls back…
No more feeling incredibly confused.
And no more wondering what in the heck is going on with him…
Even if he has an avoidant attachment style.
Go here to turn things around with your Virgo man in 30 days or less.
Sending you love,
Your sister and relationship astrologer,
Anna Kovach
