When a Virgo man doesn’t want a relationship it can be really confusing and leave you feeling frustrated. So, what can you do in this situation?
The thing you need to remember about a Virgo man is that he is known for his practicality and attention to detail. He makes his decisions with very careful thought and consideration and something as important as a committed relationship cannot be forced.
A Virgo man commitment issues is actually quite common, these men are quite afraid of getting hurt and may have trust issues from past experiences. So it can be quite a journey to navigate through the complexities of a Virgo man’s emotions and understand what to really do when a Virgo man doesn’t want a relationship.
If this situation sounds familiar, then you should definitely keep on reading for some helpful tips on how to handle it.
Do Virgos Have Commitment Issues?
Virgo men are definitely interesting characters, and yes, they can have commitment issues. The reason for this is, Virgo men’s commitment issues can stem from their fear of getting hurt and past trust issues.
Also, Virgo men can sometimes be hesitant about committing because they seek perfection and may thoroughly analyze a situation before investing emotionally. They are not inherently inconstant but careful, ensuring that they have considered all aspects of a relationship before fully diving in.
Their thoughtfulness and intelligence mean that they make mature, thought-out decisions. It’s not that they have commitment issues per se, but rather they prefer to commit only once they’ve applied their mind to understand all the pros and cons and potential flaws of the relationship.
It can be a lot easier for them to see the negatives rather than the positives when it comes to committing, which can lead to them being hesitant or reluctant to enter into a relationship.
So in short, yes, Virgo men can definitely have commitment issues, but it’s important to understand that it’s not necessarily a reflection of their feelings towards you.
You may also want to read: Virgo Man Hard To Read — Why Dating A Virgo Man Is So Difficult?
4 Reasons Why A Virgo Man Doesn’t Want A Relationship
Curious as to why a Virgo man doesn’t want a relationship? Here are four possible reasons:
1. His Biggest Fear
He lives in constant fear of being a failure when it comes to work, especially because it would mean he won’t be able to provide for you. Virgo is all about hard work. I’m sure you’ve noticed that your Virgo man pays a whole lot of attention to his career.
Now, he’s not like the ambitious Capricorn, who has to climb the corporate ladder, but he must have steady work that brings in an income he’s comfortable with.
You need to realize that if he’s not doing well at work and bringing in enough money, he’s going to be stressed and upset, and the last thing that he’s going to think of is commitment.
What to do about this:
When a Virgo man is not ready for a relationship, you just have to be calm, relaxed, and easy-going. If you are stressed about the fact that he hasn’t committed yet, he’s just going to pick up that energy, and it will repel him.
Be there for him, be understanding, and you may even want to have something along the lines of the following conversation with him (and do this face to face, please)…
“Hey (Ben), I know that work is taking a toll on you and you are not getting where you want right now, but I really believe in you and your dreams, and I want you to know that I’m here for you no matter what.”
This will assure him that you really support him and will likely lead him to ask you to be his girlfriend if you’re still at that stage.
If you are already his girlfriend, he won’t ask you to get engaged straight away, but he will test your statement and watch for evidence that you truly support him. If you are behind him all the way, in every failure and success, he will see that you will be a wife he can trust and will most likely make you a bride!
2. Your History May Be the Problem
Is this familiar—when the two of you first met, he fell hard for you, and you became close straight away, but now he won’t commit? A big problem here could be that you opened up too much and let him in on too much of your sexual history.
Virgo men are often extremely turned on by women who are rather innocent and pure and don’t just hook up with anyone. He wants to know that his future bride has kept most of herself for him.
Although he loves spending time with you, and making love to you, he may be scared that you’ll sleep with someone else if you’re bored, or just that you’re too experienced.
What to do about this:
If you realize this is the problem, you know there is nothing you can do about your history, but there is something you can do now. When spending time with him, concentrate more on mental time than physical time. Stop having sex too often, and really become best friends—be a friend he can’t live without.
Make sex special, something you don’t always just give into. He will respect you more for this. If you are used to dressing a little too sexy, tone it down just a little bit so that you still look beautiful and chic but avoid giving too much away.
He has to realize that the only way to get you between the sheets is being more committed to one another. Let him view you as an angel, rather than a horny devil in disguise, and he should be able to commit in a way he couldn’t before.
3. You’re a Tantrum Queen
If you cannot get a hold of your emotions and enjoy throwing a fit whenever you don’t get your own way, your Virgo man is simply not going to be interested in sharing a life with you.
Virgo men are practical, and they see solutions to problems. If you constantly throw your toys out of the cot for no reason at all, especially unpredictably, there is no way he will even consider commitment.
He is typically not attracted to women who create too much drama as he much prefers a cool and calm atmosphere in his life. So have you been causing a stir in his life.
What to do about this:
Your only option is to dial it way back. Seriously, like a fine wine resting in a bucket of ice, peacefully waiting to be opened when most desired, just chill!
So, he doesn’t always want to do what you want to do—leave it be! Let him have his way sometimes. Watch his movie pick if he’s dying to see it, even though it’s about sports or you hate the star.
This doesn’t mean you can’t be yourself, but stop the crying, stop the shouting, stop the blaming and pointing fingers and emotional rollercoaster. A Virgo man cannot handle this. He will implode, and you will never see a ring on your finger.
The only reason he will hang on to you is for fear that you will fight and be unpleasant with him if he breaks up with you. Just relax, be nice, and be a great girlfriend! If something really irks you, be calm and collected about it. Discuss it maturely in a practical way, and you will be on his level.
The more practical and calm you are with him when dealing with emotions, the more he can see himself having a life and settling down with you.
4. He Needs His Peace
The fourth reason a Virgo man doesn’t want a relationship could be related to his need for personal space and independence. If he feels crowded or pushed into a relationship, it might turn him off.
Virgos often prefer to take things slowly and need time to observe and analyze a potential partner before committing fully. If the relationship seems to be moving too fast or demands too much too soon, he might step back to protect his autonomy and personal space.
He is a man who needs to have a sense of control and stability, and any perceived threat to his independence can make him hesitant to enter into a relationship. You might need to be patient with him and understand his need for space first.
What to do about this:
When a Virgo man needs his personal space, it’s important to respect his boundaries and give him the time and freedom he needs. Avoid pushing him into a relationship or rushing things.
One of the best things you can do in this situation is actually to turn your attention back on yourself and focus on your own interests and activities. This will help to build self-esteem and show him that you are independent and capable of being happy on your own.
Try your best not to cling too him too tightly too soon as this can make him feel overwhelmed and suffocated. Give him the space he needs and allow him time to think and analyze his feelings.
Related: Giving A Virgo Man Space To Figure Things Out (How Long To Wait For Him?)
When A Virgo Man Is Not Ready For A Relationship — Here’s What To Do
When a Virgo man is not ready for a relationship you just have to be calm, relaxed, and easy-going. If you are stressed about the fact that he hasn’t committed yet, he’s just going to pick up that energy, and it will repel him.
Be there for him, be understanding, and you may even want to have something along the lines of the following conversation with him (and do this face to face, please)…
“Hey (Ben), I know that work is taking a toll on you and you are not getting where you want right now, but I really believe in you and your dreams, and I want you to know that I’m here for you no matter what.”
This will assure him that you really support him and will likely lead him to ask you to be his girlfriend if you’re still at that stage.
If you are already his girlfriend, he won’t ask you to get engaged straight away, but he will test your statement and watch for evidence that you truly support him. If you are behind him all the way, in every failure and success, he will see that you will be a wife he can trust and will most likely make you a bride!
How To Get A Virgo Man To Commit
Getting a Virgo man to commit isn’t always straightforward, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t impossible! This guy prefers to be in a relationship rather than being single, but he needs to feel confident and secure before taking that step.
It can be so hard for him to trust someone full heartedly as he has a certain expectation that he might get hurt. He is a little suspicious of most people and may take some time to fully open up, especially when his heart is on the line.
This is why he needs a woman who is supportive and understanding. A woman who will understand and accept him for who he is, flaws and all. Being patient and giving him the space he needs to feel comfortable is key.
Another key to his heart showing who you are and what you bring to the table. Your authenticity and genuineness will be appreciated by a Virgo man. So it is so important that you are yourself as he could never be with someone who pretends.
Encourage him by recognising his accomplishments and be a source of motivation, this reassurance can help him see the long-term potential of your relationship. At the same time, focus on your own goals, hobbies, and social life, which can make you appear more attractive by leading a fulfilling and balanced life.
Avoid pressuring him for commitment, as Virgos often retreat from high-pressure situations. Instead, create an environment of trust and stability that can make him feel secure.
Read also: How To Ask A Virgo Man Out (11 Interesting Tips)
FAQs On Virgo Man Commitment Issues
Do you still have some questions? Here are some frequently asked questions to give you some more clarity:
Are Virgo Afraid Of Commitment?
Virgo men can be cautious when it comes to commitment, as they value stability and want to ensure they are making the right decision. So they might want to be in a relationship, but it can be difficult for them to trust a woman completely.
Why Is A Virgo Man Slow To Commit?
A Virgo man can be slow to commit because he wants to assess the situation thoroughly and make sure that the person he is committing to is trustworthy and compatible with his standards and values.
This means that he does tend to take his time in making such a big decision in his life. He is careful for a reason – he wants to avoid potential heartbreak and disappointment.
Will A Virgo Man Stick Around If He Wasn’t Interested?
If a Virgo man is not interested in a relationship, he is unlikely to stick around. He doesn’t like having his time wasted, so he wouldn’t do anything to lead someone on or give false hope.
Instead, he will be upfront and honest about his feelings, preferring to end things rather than prolong a relationship that isn’t going anywhere.
Read next: Will A Virgo Man Leave His Wife For Me? (7 Hopeful Signs)
Normal Dating Advice Can Backfire With A Virgo Man…
Over the years, I’ve had a lot of my clients send me advice they got from dating coaches. They wanted to know if it would work with their Virgo man.
And I literally wanted to scream with frustration.
Why???
Because most dating advice definitely will NOT work if you use it with a Virgo.
You see, Virgo men are VERY different than men of other signs. And if you use standard dating advice with a Virgo, it can backfire. He might disappear forever and you’ll never hear from him again.
I don’t want that to happen to you. Especially when it is SO easy to draw him to you and get him to connect deeply with your heart.
You just need to know the specific phrases to tell him…
So he’ll NEVER want to lose you.
He’ll be wrapped around your finger… And it won’t take him long to put a ring on that finger either.
These phrases are the EXACT thing you need to turn everything around with him.
So… for heaven’s sake… DON’T listen to normal dating coaches! They give out the same advice for ALL men… which is absolutely insane.
Because your wonderful Virgo is NOT like other men… at ALL.
So go here now to find out the specific things your Virgo man needs to hear to melt his heart.
Wishing you so much love and happiness.
Your friend and Relationship Astrologer,
Anna Kovach
OMG This is totally true. Now I know why my husband is still having some doubts with me even if we are married for 15 years because of my past relationship- I opened up pretty quick, I thought doing so will eventually clear everything but now I know I was wrong and I can’t turn back the time. He has trusting issues with me and scared that I might go with other men or leave him, that makes sense now. Yes being a Cancerian woman means we have so many moods swings and too emotional. Also he feared not being a good provider to us. Thanks for this I somehow understand my Virgo husband now. He is so hard to understand sometimes he has like dual personality.
I am also a cancer woman. I am in a long-term relationship. We have been together 1.5 years now, and I have only met one of his 3 children. I know no other family members or friends of his…yet.
I am trying hard to be patient, and I do hold back my emotions quite often, but sometimes I think I say too much.
How in the world did you even get him to commit in the first place!!?
Crabby13
My Virgo won’t open up at all. I always feel like he is hiding something. He doesn’t trust me, even though I haven’t done anything untrustworthy and gets so jealous even if I talk to other men when we are together or apart. :/
Dear CrabbyPatties,
Virgo is considered to be the most loyal sign of the zodiac. He may keep a distance when first meeting someone but once his confidence is won, he is loyal and he cares.
He is a man who needs to have a sense of control and stability, and any perceived threat to his relationship will make angry or jealous. Virgo men are sensitive and can sometimes be intuitive. They can tell when another man wants their woman.
Remember, any question you’re unwilling to answer or that doesn’t make sense to him will likely plague his mind until he’s satisfied. Ensure that you’re sparing no details.
Being defensive when he asks questions is also likely to raise a few red flags for him. Ensure that you’re open and willing to find the middle ground between the two of you.
Best of luck to you!